Tag Archives: Pedro Martinez

Roy Halladay Facts: Strikeouts 81-100

81. The president is not worried about his approval rating. He knows his lasting legacy will be that he wiped out the national debt by selling his non-Philadelphia era Roy Halladay rookie card

82. If the Expos drafted Roy Halladay… they’d still be playing in Montreal

83. The Mythbusters would have asked Roy Halladay to be on their show, but everyone knows Roy isn’t a myth, only the man and the legend.

84. Christopher Hitchens and Richard Dawkins used to be atheists; then they saw Roy Halladay’s curveball

85. When you go to clock a Roy Halladay fastball, the Radar Gun will read “WOW!”

86. Hillary Clinton did not duck sniper fire in Bosnia… it was just a Roy Halladay fastball.

87. When batters argue a called third strike from Roy Halladay, it is only to debate exactly how awesome the pitch was.

88. The Devil went down to Georgia because he knew if he went to Philadelphia, Roy would strike his ass out.

89. Roy Halladay pays fans to jog around the bases as he stands on the mound, just so he can know how the rest of the pitchers feel.

90. Red Sox Nation is a dot in the middle of Roy Halladay’s world!

91. The Yankees may be Pedro’s daddy, but Roy Halladay makes the Yankees his bitch!

92. Roy Halladay can beat Ace Combat Zero: The Belkan War: Mission 18 on Ace Mode in 30 seconds just by staring down Solo Wing’s Morgan.

93. Watching Roy pitch will not only lower your cholesterol, but your blood pressure and stress levels

94. Roy Halladay can: turn the greyest sky blue. Make it rain, whenever he wants it to. Build a castle from a single grain of sand. Make a ship sail on dry land. Fly like a bird in the sky. Buy anything that money can buy. Turn a river into a raging fire. Live forever, if he so desired. Turn back the hands of time (you better believe he can). Make the seasons change, just by waving his hand. The reason people carry around THE END IS NEAR signs is because Roy is pitching against their favorite team.

95. Roy Halladay does not throw a fastball. He throws a 78 mph change-up, and a 97 mph change-up.

96. For a person to be canonized for sainthood by the Catholic church, proof of at least one miracle needs to be established. Of all the miracles recognized, it can be said that no saint has ever gotten as much as a foul-tip off of a Roy Halladay pitch – and it may never be achieved.

97. A squared + B squared= Roy Halladay

98. Due to Roy Halladay, scientists have now changed Einstein’s Theory of Relativity to “E=A Roy Halladay changeup squared”.

99. Roy Halladay could be the fastest to 800 home runs, but he is too busy on his off days and inning breaks fighting crime.

100. Since Roy Halladay got bored of not walking anybody, he changed the amount of balls for a walk from four to one.

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