121. Roy Halladay COULD throw a no-hitter every night, but then we would feel sorry for all the fans that pay to see a good game, so he makes the game close.
122. Roy Halladay eats Capt’n Crunch every morning for breakfast– never once has it cut the roof of his mouth.
123. You think Randy Johnson’s bird-killing fastball was awesome? Roy Halladay killed a Pterodactyl with a changeup.
124. Bachman-Turner Overdrive’s song, “Taking Care of Business” is based loosely on Roy Halladay’s starts. He always takes care of business on and off the mound.
125. In the words of Julius Caesar, “Veni, Vidi, Vici, Roy Halladay.” Translation: I came, I saw, I struck out against Roy Halladay.
126. You don’t mess with Texas… but Roy Halladay has.
127. Roy Halladay’s pitches are so confusing and have so much “action” that they fool the speed gun into reading 91 to 93 when they are really closer to 128 MPH.
128. Roy Halladay is the true reason why Waldo is hiding.
129. Jeeves asks Roy Halladay
130. Roy Halladay once struck out a hitter so bad, his kids struck out.
131. King Leonidas needed “300”. Roy would of only needed 1.
132. Roy Halladay could throw left-handed and STILL strikeout 10 Yankees.
133. Roy Halladay wouldn’t have had to say “I want these mother f@c%ing snakes of this mother f@c%ing plane!” The snakes would have sensed the awesome presence of Roy and acted accordingly, by getting off the mother f@c%ing plane.
134. Roy Halladay can make SEPTA come on time.
135. Roy Halladay defies the laws of Physics. Everyone knows you can not break the laws of Physics. So scientists had to develop a new theory which has now become universally known as the “Roy Halladay Law”.
136. Roy Halladay’ calendar goes from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Roy Halladay!
137. Roy Halladay knows how much wood a woodchuck would chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
138. Roy Halladay sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled pitching ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Roy hit the devil with a pitch and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn’t stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
139. Roy Halladay joined the Marines once. Remember that war with Iran and North Korea ? Neither do I.
140. Roy Halladay is so cool he never needs to flip the pillow.