21. If one were to successfully collect Roy’s sweat from a game and then drink it at midnight, he or she would be imbued with superpowers for 48 hours. The problem is that Roy doesn’t sweat. Sweating means that you are either nervous or exerting yourself, and Roy has no need for those.
22. Evil is constantly on the run now that Roy is with us.
23. Roy Halladay invented the Internet. When Al Gore tried to take credit, Halladay K’d him with a curve.
24. Roy Halladay isn’t left-handed, he’s bored.
25. As a 6 year old Roy Halladay once had 27 strikeouts. It was a Tee-ball league.
26. In Fantasy Baseball Leagues across the nation, the teams that have picked up Roy Halladay from the waiver wire have automatically won their league championship through forfeit. Other fantasy managers have realized that they stand no chance to Roy’s projected stats this season of 900IP, 0.00ERA, 0.00WHIP, 2,700Ks, 100W and 100S. One fantasy owner was reported as attempting to trade for Roy Halladay in his league, and had to give up Albert Pujols, $1000, and the rights to his own wife on Monday nights.
27. Cliff Lee was Roy Halladay in disguise
28. Roy Halladay once threw a changeup that the batter swung at three times, thus recording the first ever one pitch strike out. He has since done it 37 more times.
29. Roy is more powerful than Oprah.
30. Three things are certainties in life: death, taxes, and Roy Halladay